Every human being desires to feel loved and important. We look for unconditional acceptance by our families and in our own social circle. Some people naturally draw others to them while a few stand around like wall-flowers waiting to be noticed. Why are some people more trusted and admired than others? How do we get people to be attracted to us naturally?
Here are a few tips to help you learn how to become popular and draw people automatically to your side.
1. Be positive and self-confident
When we are self confident and charming in our family circles, we become more desirable, influential and persuasive. There are no rules when we are looking for acceptance. However, we can look genuinely happy when we meet people and smile radiantly. This always draws a response from people as a sunny smile can warm any heart. Confidence in one’s self is important. Be genuinely interested when you meet and get to know more people. If you try to fake your feeling and talk to people, you will end up giving them lectures instead of showing that you care.
2. Use words such as “Please” and “Thank You” often
Always thank someone when they have done something for you. Say it often enough as this makes people happy and their self-esteem escalates and they feel important. You will find that they desire to do things for you. Be polite and courteous and you will find people automatically drawn to you.
3. Pay compliments with natural spontaneity
Compliment your friends and relatives on their style of dressing or on the way they maintain meticulous homes. Never hesitate to give credit where it is due. Admiration goes a long way and when their self-esteem is boosted, they will always regard you as “charming” and seek your company.
4. Listen attentively when someone is talking
People always like to share their news and if you can listen to them and empathize you will find that they seek your company more than others. The “happy” endorphins released in their brain makes them feel good when you are paying attention. They will always value your company and this will make you popular in many circles. People who lend a helping hand and give selflessly are always regarded in high-esteem. Try to reach out to people when they feel low or require a shoulder to cry on and try not to make enemies with your neighbors and close friends.
5. Charity begins at home
When you love yourself, you stop worrying about how other people regard you. Do not hesitate to go out and be in the spotlight at a gathering. Look confident when you speak and smile. You will stand out even in a large crowd as people move in your direction. Do not harp on other people’s mistakes and be magnanimous when you deal with others. Being judgmental and critical will only get you in their bad books.
6. Get noticed by dressing neatly and smartly
This does not mean that you should be “hep” or dressed in the latest fashion. Wear clothes that compliment your figure and your skin. Wear just enough make-up and learn how to mix and match to look trendy. People who wear garish clothes and heavy make-up also draw attention but in the wrong way.
7. Drop that Ego
Try not to brag and drop names when you are in company. Your actions should draw people to you like magnets. You do not have to publicly announce who you know and how well you have done in life! People will avoid you if you try to put on airs and extol your own virtues. You will draw “moths to the flame” when you start taking an interest in other people’s stories rather than boasting about your achievements.
8. Developing a sense of humor is important
One of the best traits to be noticed and become popular is to have a humorous trait. Laugh a lot and relate humorous anecdotes to cheer someone up. Many people are drawn to those who can openly be self depreciating and witty. Not all of us are born with this happy trait. Some try to crack jokes or use smutty language in an attempt to be the star of the evening in a social gathering. They then wonder why people slowly begin to drift away.
9. Be honest and self-giving
Practice what you preach. Many people loudly acclaim their morals and begin lecturing others. People should notice your goodness, kindness and humility. It is not for you to spell it out! You will be popular when you lead others by example and be cheerful at all times.
In the words of C. Joybelle “Do not yearn to be popular, be exquisite. Do not desire to be famous; be loved. Do not take pride in being expected; be palpable, unmistakable.”
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